Nicole Avant Reflects on Resilience and Coping with Loss: “No One Is Exempt”

Nicole Avant spent much of her childhood summers in holiday enclaves like Oak Bluffs in Martha’s Vineyard and Sag Harbor in Long Island, vacation havens created by the Black middle-class elites as they were often denied entry elsewhere.

“My parents took me there, and it was great for me growing up to see Black doctors, Black lawyers, Black professionals, Black people who own their businesses,” the producer, author and former U.S. ambassador to the Bahamas recalled of her parents Clarence Avant, the late legendary musical executive known as The Black Godfather, and her mother, philanthropist Jacqueline Avant. “And it made a huge difference in my life.”

So when Avant was asked to come back to Martha’s Vineyard to attend an event designed to bolster community in Oak Bluffs while spotlighting her recent book Think You’ll Be Happy with her two close friends and fellow authors, Michelle Norris (Our hidden Conversation) and Sharon Malone (Grown Woman Talk), she rearranged her schedule to be there — and made sure to bring husband, Netflix co-CEO Ted Sarandos as well.

“It’s a mecca for Black professionals and Black intellectuals and politicians, everybody. But it’s been that way for a long time, and I always wanted Ted to experience it in the way that I’ve experienced it,” Avant told The Hollywood Reporter earlier this week.

Avant and Sarandos were both participants in the third annual Martha’s Vineyard Community Purpose event, conceived by veteran publicist and producer Marvett Britto and author James Hester. Featuring an introduction from hosts Spike Lee and wife Tonya Lewis Lee, the series, which drew hundreds of attendees including former first lady Michelle Obama, Will Packer and more, was a conversation featuring Avant, Norris and Malone with introductions from their husbands Sarandos, Comcast executive vice president of public policy Broderick Johnson and former U.S. attorney general Eric Holder. 

“When James and Marvett proposed this to me, I thought, okay, wait. I have plans that week, but I’m actually going to change because I love the idea of community. It represents what my family was all about, community and bringing everyone together and not separating people,” said Avant. “And for me to be able to be with Sharon and Michelle and have the event with two girlfriends meant it was even better for me. So it was a win-win all around.”

While introducing his wife, Sarandos recalled their first meeting, a fundraiser for then Sen. Barack Obama that she was involved in, and her first words to him were “You are late!,” drawing laughs from the crowd.

But he said it was love at first sight. Later, he described falling in love with her family as well, and touched on the tragic killing of Jacqueline Avant at 81, shot to death by an intruder in her parents’ Beverly Hills home.

Avant, who was interviewed on stage by pastor A.R. Bernard, spoke about the legacy of both her parents and overcoming the 2021 tragedy. Bernard also shared the pain of losing two of his seven children, during a poignant discussion that was still centered on hope. 

Avant told THR her message, much like her book, was that “there’s always a sense of hope, a sense of resilience, a sense of how to move forward in different stages in your life.”

“My book is not just about Black excellence,” she added. “My book is also about moving forward, getting to the other side of how I did it, but giving examples, sharing advice, sharing life lessons.”

Among those lessons were the resilience of her parents, and she wanted to make sure she honored that in the book, particularly for her mother.

“I thought, well, am I going to write about, is the headline just going to be what happened to Jacqueline Avant? Or am I going to actually tell her whole entire story? She earned that. She earned it. So that’s what I wanted to do,” she said. “And I loved having my conversation with Bernard because he’s a man of faith as well, and his experience, loss and tragedy and unfortunate things, and again, proof that you could be a pastor or anybody. And things still happen. None of us are exempt.”

Avant has been promoting her book, but she will soon turn to another project: Tyler Perry’s Netflix film The Six Triple Eight, about the only U.S. army unit composed of women of color during World War II, starring Kerry Washington; Avant is a producer. The teaser for the film got an enthusiastic response when it was shown during the recent Martha’s Vineyard African American Film Festival.

“Everyone was talking about it, which made me happy because again, it’s the energy of hope, and it’s the energy of positivity and hope and positivity doesn’t equal ease. It doesn’t always equal, ‘Things are going to be easy,’” she said. “No, it doesn’t mean that. But it also means that that still should be the intention, and it could still be difficult things that have been accomplished in life that we look at as positive outcomes. It doesn’t mean that it wasn’t difficult during the process, but it was worth it.”